Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Shallow Gal or Is She

Song of the day: You Look Good to Me by Cherelle

Sometimes me and my friends talk about how shallow some men seem to be; but in reality, we can be just as shallow. One friend, who will remain anonymous, said recently that we would probably never meet the guy she's dating because he's hard on the eyes. I was like, "Girl, that's so mean." She explained that he was good to her, but she couldn't allow herself to get physical with him because he was not attractive to her at all. My first question to her was--why did you start dating him then? Now poor dude is fascinated with my friend and yes, she'll probably break his heart after he spends more of his money on her. Is she wrong? Yes, because she shouldn't use him like that.

I've given guys my number that I wasn't really attracted to at first, but after getting to know them, I enjoyed their company. I rarely bring guys around my friends or family anyway, unless we're in a committed relationship--i.e., I think I'm in love, so them not looking like a GQ model has never phased me. But if I were to be honest, I have to admit, after an ugly dude (or two) tried to play me, I now only date men I find somewhat attractive. Of course there has to be other things besides his looks, but --well I'm just saying. It doesn't make me shallow--just being real.

There's nothing wrong with wanting the total package. Besides, what looks good to me, might not look good to you--so what if I have my preferences; so do you.

Are we too judgmental when it comes to looks?

Confession #16 - There does have to be something attractive about the guy; whether it be his entire package; his eyes, body, smile, or face.

11 comments:

nya said...

It really depends, who doesn't want to date someone they are attracted to? I know I do, however, when a person only dates someone purley b/c they are handsome or beautiful or rich then it becomes superficial to me. I've encountered a handful of good men in my life, but b/c I wasn't physically attracted to them I just couldn't let it go anywhere. He may be a good guy but if there's no attraction at all it isn't fair to him or you.

Me said...

"He may be a good guy but if there's no attraction at all it isn't fair to him or you."

Exactly Nya.

I'm far from being superficial. There has to be a lot going on underneath the layers.

Haupi said...

Some pretty sweet gifts come wrapped up in the ulgiest packages is a lesson I'm sure your friend will learn sooner or later. I love your blog and am following you now. I hope you'll come visit my blog and follow me too? Thanks!
http://darkmoneyside.blogspot.com/

Willow said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Willow said...

I noticed you haven't posted in a while, but I'm really excited to follow your blog...I think attraction is important, but only to a degree. As long as there's some level of attraction and it's someone I can see myself with long-term I'm happy.

Shelia said...

Hi Willow, sorry for the delay in posts. Life got in the way.I'm still single and have some stories to tell. Stories will pick back up in the fall. Thanks for inquiring. I appreciate that.

Anonymous said...

this is cj and i am trying to find me a black fine ass woman

SWEETMOCHA said...

Hi I was just wondering if you were planning to continue this blog. I am also a single black woman and would love commentary from that perspective. Or, could it be that you are no longer single ;-)

Me said...

SWEET MOCHA, I'm single AGAIN...so there will be more posts on Confessions of a Single Black Woman.

Me said...

Ladies, I got a chance to meet the man in the pic of this post--Mr. Darren Sharper and he is just as fine in person. Those dimples will have you drooling :)

MyShallow Gal said...

I love anything regarding the topic of Shallow People. I certainly get my fill at http://www.myshallowgal.com

 
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